Friday, 3 April 2015

The Death of a love one: STEPS TO ACCEPTANCE





Death is probably the state that human beings fear the most. And when death is mentioned it means the permanent vaporization of a living entity to continue its divine pilgrim in a different dimension. As to the people that dead soul has left behind, nothing but grief, depression and confusion rule their thoughts. What remedies could be done to lessen the loss and sadness left by a loved one who has gone their way? Here are some simple ways that’d help ease the pain but remember it would only minimize the grief not completely take it away, recovering is a long way and it isn’t that easy to forget about a love one’s departure eternally:

1. Keep away the things that mostly remind you of the person

Although that doesn’t mean you’re going to throw away all the things that that person has in his/her closet, this step simply means that you should keep the highly valuable things that can mostly make you cringe in tears because you have remembered a memory of that person regarding that certain thing. If you keep on displaying it and letting things seem like the normal, you’re sabotaging your moving on process. Nothing is ever going to be the same ever ever again. Things have changed now, keep that always in your head.





2. Seek for help

You could never go on through grief just by yourself, you’ll need friends who’ll understand and be with you up until you get better. Accepting a death of a love one is never that easy and recovering is just as hard as losing that person. You might be spacing out on the first few days, unable to absorb why that person has left you permanently, one way or another you’ll seek for people who’ll never give up on you and give you the hope you have lost upon losing that love one.



3. Pray for guidance

When dealing with grief, you don’t need only your friends and your family members, you also need the divine intervention of the Almighty. You’ll always find comfort by just praying and asking for guidance to let you accept that death is a part of life and that people would come and go no matter what. Although at some point you’ll question why God did take away the person who’s dear to you and leaving you all alone by yourself wrecking your mind for the possible things that you have done wrong. Stop. It’s not your fault. 
Some people need to go in order for us to learn that life is never a bed of roses and that we need to discover things in life on our own. Always ground yourself in God and believe that he would always provide no matter how hard the situation you are in may be. He will guide, he will provide.






4. Live for those who are left

Remember that you aren’t the only one who’s left behind by that person’s eternal departure, the people around you are dealing with grief too and they have also realized that being strong and accepting a loved one’s departure are the only choices you’re left to take on. Remember that life doesn’t end when you lose one, there are far more things worth living for and things happen because God has an equal plan as to what your life may become and at some time you’ll realize that what has gone has taught you something way more significant and you’ll be happy you have aced and discovered it yourself.




 5. Take things slowly

After everything that you have been through, then you’ll realize that acceptance never comes in easy and instantly, it is a gradual process that you’ll unravel day by day. It’s like unwrapping a gift slowly for you’ll know there’s a great thing that’s waiting for you inside that gift. Just take things slowly. 

Acceptance does not require you to forget about that person, it’s about learning how to live your life without that person anymore. Although, at some points, you’ll remember that person-may it be because you accidently went to the place you’d always sit on when you talk together or maybe you had a glimpse of your picture together, when all things were still well, learning to let go is a state of happiness and happiness is a state of acceptance. Just learn to take things step by step, bit by bit, you’ll pull through.





 6. Breathe

 Now, you have come to the last step of acceptance. Inhale deeply and forget all the pains the death of that love one has caused, for he/she is already happy wherever he/she may be. Remember all the people who never gave up on you and has kept you strong and in tack even if life has shown you all the possible ways to break down and end everything at once. 

Exhale and learn from the experience that even if you have lost a love one, you have learned more than what life has to offer and the best part is you have learned it all by yourself and through the sadness you have been through. 

Lastly, start anew. It’s not about forgetting all the memories you have been through with that person, it’s starting to live your life without the uncertainty and sadness the memories of that person has caused, it’s starting from the beginning with the acceptance that people come and go for a reason and we may be pained because of their departure, they’ll always leave a mark in our hearts. They’ll always be remembered and we’ll never forget how they touched our lives at one point and made us feel loved at the simplest way.

Start again and carry the love that loved one has left inside your heart. He/she may be far from you reach anymore, always know that he/she is looking out for you wherever he/she may be and that your life would still go on. A death of one does not mean the end of another. Accept that things leave and God has a reason why.

 As mysterious as it can get, you’ll know why, as time goes by. Breathe and start again. It doesn't hurt to be happy even after things have fell apart.





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